Project Absurd - Celebrating The Daft!

1976 SEARS CHRISTMAS WISH BOOK

PART 2 - Vans, Appliances, Furniture and Bedding

November 2009

by Kelly

For a while now, I've been dying to get my hands on an old Sears or JC Penney catalog from the 1970s. A Sears Wish Book was what I most hoped to find. They can be found on eBay, but I'm not willing to pay top dollar for one. So, I've been scouring flea markets and thrift stores hoping to find one with no luck. Then a friend of Ham's came along and offered to let us borrow one of his (he collects old items from our town, and this came from our local Sears). Of all the things I've wanted to review, I wanted this the most. Alas, I have my holy grail. There is so much goodness to share from this catalog, be warned: this is a multi-part series! This chapter covers vans, appliances, furniture and bedding.

"Vans?!" I bet you're thinking. "Seriously... VANS?" No, of course they didn't sell any vans (that didn't belong to Barbie) at Sears. But think back to the seventies for a moment. Picture it, everything around you is orange, brown and avocado green... you look out your window and what do you see coming up the road? It's your cousin Keith in his big honkin' yellow van! When he arrives he shows you the picture window and the shagadelic interior. Where, oh where could you get groovy accessories like his?

Oh yeah. SEARS!

The full header text is "SEARS VAN SHOP . . . CUSTOMIZING ACCESSORIES THAT CAN TURN ANY VAN INTO A PERSONAL ROAD VEHICLE" And Greg® did a fantastic job with his Mood-Murals, didn't he? For $22.98 you could have "Flite," "Nightwatch," or "Schooner" adorn your van. Because nothing screams "Get Er Done!" like "Flite". Why did he spell it like that?

What else could you to do make your van more to your personal liking? I've got it! WALL SIGNS!

Take a good look at the fine print. These are no ordinary signs! "Two 12-v automotive-type bulbs provide soft illumination"! $18.99 could turn your van into a saloon! Or you could dance the night away in your van's ample ballroom! Keep on truckin!

Moving on, lets discuss one of my favorite hits of the 70s - appliances! I didn't actually get a lot of appliance photos, because in the seventies they were essentially all the same. Every appliance came in one of four colors (as did everything, including your clothes, in the seventies). Here is an example of a washing machine:

This trash compactor has an interesting element you don't see anymore:

Reversible front panels so you can change the color to any seventies color you like!

This dishwasher came in the same 4 colors as the washer and the trash compactor. I love how the dishes match the dishwasher!

The undercounter model has reversible front panels, too!

Incidentally, the five colors of the seventies (as noted in the washing machine photo and the photo above) are: White, Coppertone, Avocado, Tawny Gold and Black.

Let's talk about furniture. How about Archie Bunker's recliner?

I think this came in the same colors as the appliances! The fabric is a comfy Olefin tweed. Gawd, who wants to sit on itchy tweed? In case you have difficulty with the concept, the catalog thoughtfully gives full instructions on how to use a recliner:

I found these beanbags in the catalog and didn't know what category they belonged in, so furniture it is!

Let's take a closer look and see what us children of the seventies were into enough to sit our butts on...

Oh, I KNOW! I KNOW! I KNOW! ...Mr. Kotter and The Sweathogs:

We were also into Convoy, Star Trek, Spiderman, Fat Albert and Pepsi-Cola:

Nothing like sitting around being fat drinking your Pepsi on a Fat Albert bean bag chair! I love it!

In 1976 nothing was bigger than Fonzie!

And then there were the cartoons:

Here are some Special Clocks For Special People:

So, so fug.

I'm throwing in this next picture because I couldn't believe the my eyes when I saw it:

Heated footstools, bitches!

Have a boy that needs some bedding? Get him this, everyone else in the seventies got it for their son! I swear I didn't have a brother or anything and I remember this bedding. Must have been my cousins' house I saw it in, or perhaps the brothers of friends or something.

If you had a girl and you wanted to scare her to death you could have bought her this Alien Cat Bedding:

This demands a closer look:

Gawd, that is SO SCARY! You could also get her this if you enjoyed waking up at 4 am with a kid having mouse and rat nightmares:

If your kid's name was ROBERT, SUE, JIM or ANN you could get them one of these bedspreads. Or even if that wasn't their name, you could be a madcap cut-up and get them one anyway!

Nothing says Sober in the 70s like Budweiser Bedding!

So long from Part 2 of our 1976 Sears Wishbook Series. Stay tuned for Part 3!

(Posted 11/2009)